Why you being a dickhead?

I've been thinking a lot about this.

I'm pretty sure I'm one of those known assholes. No, I'm certain. They get all meta in their discussion of it. But I think it's a lot simpler than that.

There was a quote in The Emperor's Children that really stuck with me (though nothing else but the context did): "He was canny and thoughtful and he held the world to impossible expectations."

Now this is exactly what I think a lot of assholes are. This is what I think I am.

I want everything to be as much as it can be. If we're not all trying to be good all the time (learning or teaching always), it's frustrating. So when people start getting all smug and indolent, you go asshole on them.

The problem for me is that I get smug and indolent sometimes in the assholery and I don't know when to turn it off. Mindfulness is a good first step, but sometimes you just can't see it.